A little bit about everything! - Elaine Bosvik Ciarnau

  Mom's Haunted House Back in the 1950's my Mom, Wilma decided to stop working as a cookee in the bush camps to raise her children. She moved to town, rented a house and decided to start taking in people for room and board. She knew two young policemen who were wanting to rent two of the bedrooms. Another woman took the third room. There were little problems with room 1 the door would open, even when locked. Windows would slam shut, smells of aftershave  would waft through the air. An occasional cool breeze would pass by without a window being open. One policeman, John, took that room as his own. The second week he started feeling like someone was watching him. He was blaming his cop friend that he did something to the room to prank him. He denied doing anything. A couple of night later the cop was startled by a noise. He opened his eyes and standing at the foot of the bed was a man dressed in a black suit. John, yelled for the man to get out. He disappeared. John thought he wa

 Going to spend a few days in a trailer at my Aunt and Uncles farm was something  I loved as a teen. I'd take one of my friends and have a great time. Usually we did something to cause problems. One afternoon my friend Judy and I noticed the fence to the cow pasture was broken. We didn't want t he cows getting out and  decided to try and fix the fence. We could later brag to my Aunt and Uncle how we saved the cows and fixed the fence. No matter how we tried, we couldn't get the fence up and had to come up with another idea. I had a brilliant thought, we would coax the cows and bull into the barn and tie them up.  We got them all into their stalls, but there was a problem. The bull wasn't happy.  He was restless and causing a ruckas.  Judy went in his stall and was cornered as she tried to secure him to the post. He just kept backing out and snorting. I had another brilliant plan. I was going to go outside the barn door and close it so the bull wouldn't see the light

 I'm sure many of us have made our way to carnivals as teens. Wanting to try every ride with our friends. Eating all the goodies that you only get from the concessions.  Playing all the games to try and win a cheap stuffed animal that you spent way too much on, knowing you could have bought a better one at half the price.  Throwing up from eating too much and going back on the rides, toting the big teddy bear with you. Those were fun times and a great part of childhood. You could always make friends with the carnies and get a free ride or a free stuffie. I became friends with a young girl who was running the tilt-a-whirl. I was 16, she was the same. She left with the carnival because of a bad home situation.  I found out during our conversations that many of the young people at the time were only 16 to 20 years old. Most had the same stories. They said travelling with the carnival from place to place was better than being at home.  They looked after each other, had a place to sleep

                                                   The Outhouse Fiasco I can't believe my Aunt and Uncle let me get close to their farm after all the things that happened. They must have thought disaster followed me. My friend and I seemed to find trouble in everything we did.  One evening  after playing hard all day, we stunk, we were dirty and wanted to have a Sauna. My Aunt started it up for  us and all we had to do was wait.  Julie decided to use the outhouse before we got into the sauna.  Both of us were overweight, Julie more so, and was shorter.  Shortly after I hear screaming for the outhouse. I figured she saw a snake, no big deal.  Again, she is hollering my name. I figured I better check, not that I wanted to see a snake or smell the outhouse, but I did go over. I open the door, there is no Julie.  Where the heck did she go? I hear yelling inside and looked down. Sitting on the shit pile beneath the outhouse was Julie.  She broke the outhouse seat and took a plunge.  She

 You'd think being a Maid of Honor for a friend would be great, not in my case. I was 23 years old when asked. The bride and groom were older, she was in her 30's and Bob was maybe 50. Not sure, but he was quite a bit older than Kathy. Plans were made, it was a pot luck reception and I made the wedding cake since I loved cake decorating.  Everything seemed to fall into place. The morning of the wedding we went to get our hair done in up dos. We got dressed and were picked up to go to the church. Waiting for guests to be seated and the ceremony to begin, I was informed we would be going to the Marina for photos after. The ceremony went well, I noticed the groom didn't have his teeth, only his two fangs were showing.  It made for some interesting photos. The car was waiting for us to head to the marina. It was nice and sunny, flowers were blooming, water and boats behind us, a perfect backdrop.   After the photos we head back to the parking lot to find out Bob sent the car ba

Out of Toilet Paper As I sat on the toilet taking a dump, brushing my teeth and reading  tweets, I realized some moron didn't refill the toilet paper. (That would be me).  Some idiot took all the laundry downstairs and didn't replace the towels. (That would be me again). I suspect that the males in this house think they are replaced by little fairies.  I tried to message my Son who was in the garage with his Dad AND the toilet paper. No reply! What the hell am I going to do, take off my shirt to wipe my arse? After checking the cupboard in front of me for my hidden emergency roll and find nothing (I forgot I used that last week and didn't replace it) I sat there for 10 minutes praying someone will come inside. No such luck.   Only option was to take a shower and spray my butt with the nozzle. Thank God it's detachable. Soon as I get in, I hear a knock on the door. My son, " mom, I brought you toilet paper, you forgot to fill up the holder. I had a shit earlier and